So stuck in story.

So stuck in telling story.

So scarred.  So empty.

So not restored.  So not complete.

So hiding impact.  So hiding scars.  So hiding self.

So easily trapped.  So easily complacent.  So easily compliant.  So easily fooled.  So easily dieing.

So busy denying.  So busy doing.  So busy running.  So busy hurting. 

So shut down.  So hopeless.  So dead end.  

So buried. So tragic.

So stuck in telling story.

 

So not the end!  So much more to reveal.  So much more to gain.

So very hard.

So few who go for it.

So tragic!

 

Can we shift the story we live in?

The women gathered around the table were of varying generations and perspectives.  It was an eclectic looking group with one goal: create a follow-up event to a recent "Status of Women" expo.  Our first task was to select a focus for the event, i.e., around what topic would we build?

When the brainstorming session began I was struck with an understanding that each suggestion was framed around the individual stories that each woman carried.  Each brought to the table the "story" either assigned to her by culture or applied to her by experience. The suggestions focused on what had happened to women.  I could feel the room drain from hope to gloom. 

So I opened my mouth and spun a different story.  "Can't we create a different conversation?  What if we shift our stories to focus on the strengths of women, the core qualities and positive aspects of women rather than stay under the labels and barriers?"  They were stunned.  And the hope rose in the room.

The stories we tell, and the stories we invest in create the framework for how we conduct our lives.  They either confine us or create possibility.

It's the difference between fate and destiny.  Perhaps you've heard me talk about this before.  Fate is the path that we take when we allow circumstances to define us.  Destiny is the path we take when we shift the story by living out of the strengths of our identity.

Restoration is about identifying the restraints of story and shifting them.  It's about changing the relationship you have with "the story".  It's about fighting back, standing up and saying, "I will not be confined by your perspective or actions." 

You absolutely can shift the story in which you live!

Put aside the story assigned to you!

Her eyes tell me she doesn't fully grasp what I'm sharing.  As a young child she was repeatedly molested by family members and she has deep beliefs about her value and who she is.  Hearing that she isn't what happened to her - that the story the molester assigned to her isn't hers - rocks her foundation.

The beliefs based on trauma are so deep that she feels threatened when I offer an alternative.  I get it.  We build our relationships and our world based on internal capacities defined by our experiences.  And it limits us and how we interact and move.  When I suggest that there is more to her, she feels rattled and wonders about this hope.  Can she really become all she was created to be?

Hope comes in strange packages.  It can come in a song, in a whisper from your heart, or in the words of a speaker.  Hearing it is not enough.  The next step is up to you.  What will you do with the hope offered?  Will you explore it?  Will you do the hard work of internalizing it and shifting what you think? 

Put aside the stories others have written for you and discover who you really are!